Whitley’s Journal (Page 53)

Last Thursday night I woke up some time after midnight and saw that the living room was filled with a blue light. I thought to get up but could not, and fell back asleep almost at once.

I dreamed of friends and relatives, very peculiar dreams, as if I was searching for something among them that I could not quite find.

When I woke up the next morning, my left ear was hurting terribly. The object that was put in it in May of 1989 had migrated from the top of the ear down nearly to the lobe, leaving the whole ear terrifically sore.
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Christmas has come, and with it a renewed sense of inner joy. I always have a rough time between October and December, because that’s the part of 1985 that I was dealing with the visitors, but unable to consciously remember what was happening at night. When you see in Communion the scene of me prowling around with the shotgun, that’s when it happened. I also set up an alarm system I bought at Radio Shack.

Nobody knows anymore when Jesus was actually born, but his life is now a symbol of the greater life of man, so it is appropriate that we celebrate his birth at the same time that this ancient human festival takes place.
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It is late here, midnight passing. December has come again, and for the past few months I have been enduring the same demonic nights that I experience every year at this time, as my spirit relives the hard pilgrimage that led to the night of December 26, 1985.

The feelings are so complex, the fears so deep and the love, too, so deep, that sometimes, even after all these years,the whole emotional avalanche of having the visitors emerge into my life threatens to drown me.

It was not all bad, not by any means, and that what makes my present condition so hard. I have lost loves, great loves, towering loves, left behind me a life and experiences that are somewhere close to the pinnacle what can happen to a living man.
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Let me begin by saying that it is my fervent hope that I am entirely wrong about what follows. I fear that the opposite is true, though, which is why I’m writing it now.

We must wait two more months before the Democrats take power, and the Bush Administration appears at this point to be actually working to harm the economy during these eight fatal weeks.
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