It’s because we LIE to OURSELVES about what turns us on–you have to meet that special one IN PERSON for your hormones (and your libido) to ramp up. Even the sexiest description just won’t work. No matter how much people say they’re looking for someone smart, who they can trust and laugh with, what they REALLY WANT is a sexually attractive partner (and this applies to both to men AND women).
Could such unrealistic expectations be the reason these people are lonely in the first place? In LiveScience.com, Jennifer Welsh quotes psychologist Eli Finkel as saying, "People will readily tell you what they value in a romantic partner, but study after study shows that those preferences don’t predict whom daters are actually attracted to when they meet flesh-and-blood partners. Now we can get under the hood with this quirky methodology to see what people actually prefer in live-interaction settings." In other words, what REALLY turns people on.
Welsh quotes psychologist Paul Eastwick as saying, "If a person tells me, for example, that she doesn’t care about how attractive a guy is, our research suggests that her claim isn’t worth all that much."
Finkel agrees and says, "If you are browsing a bunch of profiles you are assuming you can glean information from those profiles that is actually relevant to how attracted you will be to that person when you meet face to face. People really don’t have that level of accurate insight."
One thing Whitley Strieber has "accurate insight" about is MEDITATION–he’s taught thousands of people how to do it through his many meditations (just for subscribers) on this website, as well as with the help of his groundbreaking book The Path. Make tomorrow DIFFERENT: Meditate today!
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